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The Prosecution: Beth

Sometimes she films me while having a meal. I’ll see myself on her social media – it’s like a sudden shock.

A close companion of a decade, Marielle, calls herself the “content queen”. It can be amusing for a short while, but it strains our relationship.

She is an extrovert, there's a constant urge the need to document everything all the time. During meals out, her motto is, “The camera eats first,” and snaps pictures with bright lighting, which induces embarrassment. I don’t like it when other people see her performing for the camera – I experience vicarious awkwardness. Another annoyance is because the food gets cold.

She's not quite an online personality yet, but she is aspiring to become one. She creates video blogs about city life, her daily routine, and her work as a stylist. The material is quality, I’ll give her that, but I prefer not to be dragged into it. Sometimes I'm captured while I’m eating, or just accompanying her. Later, I appear on her Instagram later, and it comes like a surprise: I’ll have bare-faced, an awkward face or be captured while eating. It feels invasive.

She also anticipates that I will to record her at inconvenient times. Often I'm in conversation to someone else, or we’ll just be hanging out in the street. I feel like our friendship has turned into me being her free crew. She could easily hire someone if she wanted high-quality content. Upon mentioning my unease about the situation, she brushed it off. I've been invited to a couple of brand events, which were appreciated, but that doesn't compensate for all the energy I invest assisting her create material.

I appreciate that Marielle has helped me with my design career, but I resist our connection to become merely a tally of exchanges. I don’t feel she's insincere or dishonest, but at times I feel that if recording starts, we will start performing in a way that presents a favorable image for her channel.

Her directive is, “Alright, smile for the camera!” and record me smiling with someone. It feels forced. It's crucial her to recognize that our decade-long friendship still has boundaries. I enjoy being with her, but I also desire to enjoy it without being filmed, altered, or posted for an audience. I am not a accessory for her Instagram.

The Other Side: The Content Creator's View

I want my friend to see that the creations we produce together can get us an opportunity.

I love creating videos. It’s not just a pastime; it’s part of who I am. Creating videos and sharing my life online enables me to express myself and connect with people in new ways.

I don’t see myself as a full influencer yet, but it’s smart to generate income from your passions. I look up to people on TikTok who execute that style of casual, DIY content creation.

Creating content is my version of engaging with life: noticing the nuances, posting them with an viewership that values the art behind it. I never intend to make my friend uneasy. Bringing her to professional gatherings was my method of offering access, providing her a chance to witness behind-the-scenes moments that could help her career in design too. That’s not blackmail, it's simply being realistic.

I’d still take her to these events even if she didn’t help me, but I want her to see what the content we create together can get us: an opening. I know not all people enjoys being filmed, but often spontaneity is what makes material authentic. Being recorded occasionally is part and parcel of being my friend. I would delete anything she requested, but she has never asked yet.

I don't demand anybody to be my personal filmmaker, but companions help each other in small ways. I thought filming a short video now and then would be fun for Beth. Innovation thrives in partnership, and having my friend around makes projects energetic and enjoyable. I don't compel her to participate in anything, and I’d never deliberately humiliate her. But filming together occasionally is part of how I record our shared experiences.

I value Beth’s friendship profoundly and don’t want content creation to come between us. I am ready to compromise: like asking before filming, and steering clear of shots that might make her uncomfortable.

This is not about control, it's regarding sharing my world while still respecting hers. Obviously content creation is not a replacement for genuine friendship: it's merely part of how I live my life and I want her to be involved in a way that’s agreeable for both of us.

The Jury: Public Sentiment

Should Marielle stop filming herself and her friend when they are out together?

There’s nothing more uncomfortable than having a friend point a camera at you. I understand that it's her passion, but I wouldn't ask friends come to my workplace. Maybe she can find like-minded creators to collaborate with. With the uncertain future of AI, human connections are the only thing we have – cherish them!
A respondent, 25

If you’re doing something as a career, it's unfair to expect your friends for help repeatedly, even if they have done it before. While she enjoys creating, that doesn’t mean everyone around her is content. She must to respect Beth’s privacy.
Another reader, 26

Marielle might love making content and displaying her life online, but it isn't for everyone. It’s nice she has helped her friend professionally, but she must to hear what Beth wants.
A commenter, 27

It seems like you care about each other, so cling to that and make sure it’s the priority in your friendship. Foster some authentic memories, where genuine feelings are stored, not online archives. In fact, public figures who seem to share their worlds actually have more privacy than it seems.
Sarah, 53

She seems to be not fully engaged nor authentic when they're together – she’s working. Both seem confused as to what’s reasonable. The solution is not found in trying to change one another, but in each establishing defined limits around what feels acceptable to them and seeing if there is an mutually agreeable compromise.
A final view, 71

Your Turn to Be the Judge

Consider this question: is Marielle over-exposing their bond?